self sacrifice - ayn rand

Thrive Again: Recognize Whether You’re Being Used

In relationships, there are often those who feel entitled (USERS) and those who are so kind-hearted they have no clear boundaries and don’t know how to say “no.”

People who are lazy and feel the world owes them something tend to select relationship partners who are kind-hearted, hard-working, giving and boundary-less (OVER-PRODUCERS). In the end, the USER becomes helplessly enabled and the OVER-PRODUCER ends up used, crushed, and depleted.

Should an Over-Producer decide to break free of the abusive dynamic, the User will employ a variety of manipulative tactics — including guilt tripping the person they’re sucking dry, lying, shifting blame, making excuses, deflecting people’s focus off of them, and even violence (click here to learn more about their manipulative tactics).

What’s True for Individuals Is True of Nations

atlas shruggedThe same dynamic is going on at a national and global level. The Users are draining the Over-Producers dry. And if anyone dares say the Over-Producers are being used and should set boundaries that protect them from abuse, then the Users call them names, accuse them of phobias, racism, cruelty and a myriad of other “politically incorrect” vices.

Let’s face it, no tick wants to be removed from its host. It will always burrow in deeper when threatened with removal.

The sad part is when other kind-hearted (yet naive) Over-Producers haven’t awakened to the fact that they’re being used, and fight their fellow producers.

One of my favorite books on this subject is Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged. It’s definitely worth the read if you struggle with being an Over-Producer. It changed my life, awakened me to how I was enabling others, and reading it was the first step to my recovery.

“If you saw Atlas, the giant who holds the world on his shoulders, if you saw that he stood, blood running down his chest, his knees buckling, his arms trembling but still trying to hold the world aloft with the last of his strength, and the greater his effort the heavier the world bore down upon his shoulders – What would you tell him?”

I…don’t know. What…could he do? What would you tell him?”

To shrug.”

Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged.

It’s time for America to Shrug! Is it time for you to shrug too?

 

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

America, Put Your Oxygen Mask On (1)

Put Your Oxygen Mask On, America!

If a mom never took time for self-care and constantly spent her strength on her career, volunteering, saying “yes” to everything asked of her until she was depleted, ragged and worn and she had no time to enjoy her life or children, we’d tell her she’s killing herself. That she needs to put her oxygen mask on herself first.

America, setting boundaries is not xenophobicWhy do we expect our nation to

  • spend her strength in foreign wars,
  • pay to bail out every corporation,
  • take responsibility for other people’s refugees,
  • rebuild other nations,
  • spoil our children with freebies

when we’re drowning in debt and our elderly live on peanut butter? Our seniors are the ones who invested their lives’ earnings for a retirement, yet they have been stolen from and treated like second class citizens.

Many of our own people are homeless, barely scraping by, and those who protect us are paid peanuts and begrudged pay and medical care when they return home from fighting in these foreign wars.

What is true for an individual is true for a nation. It’s time to put the oxygen mask on ourselves. It’s not only logical, it’s the merciful thing to do.

Speaking as someone who has been physically depleted in recent months, when you get to that point, you’re no good to anyone. The best thing for everyone is for you to get healthy again, rest and focus on those close to home.

I’m getting so sick of people saying its callous, selfish, evil, racist or egotistical for America to focus on our own health as a nation instead of saving the world when we’re teetering on demise ourselves.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Thrive Again: Who You Are is Not What You Do

Who You Are Is Not What You Do

My friend Martina Muir says, “Who You Are Is Not What You’ve Done.” I’ve put a little twist on it… “Who you are is not what you do” either.

When you lose the ability to do what you’ve always done, it can create such a sense of loss that it strikes at the core of who you are as a person. You know what I mean — those things we do that define us:

  • the pianist who has lost a hand,
  • the football player who’s had one too many concussions, or
  • the elderly bus driver who’s judgment is impaired and can’t drive anymore.
  • the mom whose children are all grown and have moved away from home.
  • the entrepreneur who is suffering a health challenge that affects her ability to work.

When one talent becomes our identity and that talent is damaged or lost, it can make you feel worthless and as if you don’t hold any value anymore.

In this segment I talk about dealing with this kind of loss and how to reframe the situation to discover who you really are. If you’d like to work this through with someone and process the loss, click here.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Each Loss Deserves Its Own Grief

Thrive Again: Each Loss Deserves Its Own Grief

   

When you have suffered multiple setbacks or losses, it's important not to lump them all together into one big loss. This is something my husband taught me about how to process multiple losses:

Are you ready to bounce-back from loss? Would you like to reset and rebuild without all the confidence-shattering thoughts and feelings associated with loss? Click here to setup an energy therapy session to let it go and move forward.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Thrive Again: Lost Your Desire to Leave a Legacy?

      

If you used to have big dreams of making a difference, changing the world, or leaving a legacy; but you don't care about those things now that you've suffered devastating loss, don't beat yourself up. This is normal and here's why and how to bounce back and thrive again.

 

Are you ready to bounce-back from loss? Would you like to reset and rebuild without all the confidence-shattering thoughts and feelings associated with loss? Click here to setup an energy therapy session to let it go and move forward.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Thriving Again: Stand Up for Yourself

If the challenges you face have to do with another person whose chronic unacceptable behavior causes you pain, you could be in a situation where you’re being used or even abused.

In order to thrive again, you need clear boundaries about what you will and will not accept from others. This can be difficult for those of us who are people pleasers or who are super conscientious about owning our role in a situation, or for those who are “fixers.”

Users need someone to use and fixers need someone to fix. Combine them and you get a really unhealthy dynamic.

If you’re a people pleaser, are scared of conflict, are easily guilt tripped, or are a “fixer,” you could be a prime target for manipulators.

This short video shares the 6 Tactics Manipulators Use. If you see a pattern of these being used on you, it’s probably time for you to set some clear boundaries or get out of a bad situation. Learn more here.

 

 

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Thrive Again: To the Determined Fighter Suffering Loss

 

In this segment on bouncing back from loss, I'm speaking to the determined fighter for whom "quit" is a 4-letter word. I'm talking to you if you're the person who feels compelled to stay in a bad situation so you can "figure it out" or "fix it." You're always hoping for that miracle, that breakthrough moment.

What is your experience of loss trying to teach you? Probably not what you think!

Are you ready to bounce-back from loss? Would you like to reset and rebuild without all the confidence-shattering thoughts and feelings associated with loss? Click here to setup an energy therapy session to let it go and move forward.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

One question changes everything

Thrive Again: The Power of One Question

 

When you've suffered devastating loss, getting off the downward path requires a perspective shift. My friend Anastasia Montejano asked me a single question that snatched me up from a downward spiraling path and placed my feet on a better road.

This one simple question caused me to ponder for some time. It helped me process the past, look for the good, and move forward more confidently than I ever thought I'd be able to again.

In this short video I share that question and hope that it will be as impactful for you as it was for me:

 

Are you ready to bounce-back from loss? Would you like to reset and rebuild without all the confidence-shattering thoughts and feelings associated with loss? Click here to setup an energy therapy session to let it go and move forward.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Bounce back from loss

Thrive Again: 3 Tools to Bounce Back from Devastating Losses

      

It's incredibly easy to get stuck in a downward spiral when you've suffered devastating loss or a series of losses. Loss begins to feel normal and begins to become what we expect. Once your mind has gotten stuck in expecting bad things, there seems to be more and more bad things to validate that belief.

You need something to help you flip the switch and reset the lens through which you see the world. These 3 things are helping me. Perhaps they'll help you as well.

Energy therapy is also a great way to reset your belief systems and expectations. Find out more here.

Did you miss the first video? "5 Perks to Losing Everything"

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.

Almost everyone who has accomplished anything big has suffered Massive, confidence-shattering, lifestyle-resetting loss.

Thrive Again: 5 Perks to Losing Everything

God's Steering. Relax and TrustThe law of attraction folks don’t talk about it. Even those who expand their discussions to all the laws of abundance don’t really talk about it. But it’s something that most likely is going to happen to you at least once in your life.

And when it does you’re going to think you’ve done something wrong. You’re going to think the laws have suspended for you. Or you’re going to be tempted to abandon all hope.

What is it? In one word LOSS. Massive, confidence-shattering, lifestyle-resetting loss.

Almost anyone who has ever accomplished big things in life has endured it. Yet, the gurus make you think you can avoid it with positive thinking. I don’t think you can.  I think it’s all part of the process. And here are the 5 things I’ve taken away from life-shattering loss. I hope you find them helpful if you’re going through something similar:

 

 

Are you ready to bounce-back from loss? Would you like to reset and rebuild without all the confidence-shattering thoughts and feelings associated with loss? Click here to setup an energy therapy session to let it go and move forward.

About Marnie Marcus

Marnie (Pehrson) Marcus is a best-selling author and marketing and social media consultant specializing in digital content creation and Facebook Ad Management. Get a FREE 20-minute strategy session with Marnie here.